5 Bachelor Party Destinations to Bid Your Buddy an Epic Farewell

Your situation: Best friend’s finally decided to bite the bullet and get hitched. He’s too busy donating grey cells and manhood on deciding with his fiancée which flowers will be used to adorn those walls that nobody’s going to look at. So it’s up to you to hunt for some kickass bachelor party destinations. 

Your Goal: To make your best friend rethink the whole institution of marriage.

Your Mood: Perplexed.

Brothers, we’ve all been there (or will be, God help us).

Gone are the days when kegs of beer and strip clubs (or as they say in Mumbai, Ras Malai Dance Bar) were enough to bid your buddy farewell to the vicious circle of seven rounds. The millennium has changed, and so have we. The game, folks, needs to be upped.

So relax, take a deep breath and a few swigs of that beer while it’s cold, and start taking notes. After all, there’s no better gift than the gift of travel.

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1. Leave Conscience at Home and Hit Thailand

Thailand’s great for when you don’t have more than a weekend to spare. Better yet, you can get a visa on arrival and make things a lot simpler.

From scuba diving to watching kickboxing matches to hilariously disturbing transvestite shows, the options for you and your buds are endless.

You’d want to hit at least one of these places: Bangkok, Phuket or Pattaya. If the groom-to-be likes flapping around in water, head to Koh Phangan. Plan your schedule well and you might find yourself at a Full Moon Party. Those are always awesome.

And those charming ladyboys you’ve all heard about; well, try staying sober long enough to check for bulges in the wrong places. That’s really all the advice I can give.

Thailand: Visit to make weekends wonderful.

2. Get a Higher Perspective of Things In Amsterdam

If your pockets are considerably deep (bless you!), Amsterdam is a pretty good choice for some good ol’ debauchery.

The first thing you need to do is get a decent accommodation in Dam Square to be in the centre of things. All the landmarks (read bars and nightclubs) are nearby.

This next bit may sound weird but wait for it.

You should start with the museums.

No, seriously. The museums. Like the Sexmuseum and the Hashmuseum. You want to see the museums.

Enlightenment attained, stop by the coffeeshops. They sell goodies that go splendidly with Bob Marley songs and attempts at figuring out Hawking’s Theory of Everything. Sometimes, they do sell coffee too.

Evenings are great for a beer bike activity. Get on a bike and explore Amsterdam the way the locals do, chugging beer all the way. Raise incoherent toasts to the good old days and make foolishly optimistic plans to do this all over again next year.

Now, stagger off the bike and head behind Dam Square to the notorious Red Light District. Ogle at the windows as girls you could never get without your wallets show you that sometimes, dreams do come true.

Amsterdam: The closest you’ll get to sitting on clouds (legally).

3. Visit the Sexiest Beach In The World In Rio, Brazil

‘Ipanema’ in the Tupi language means ‘stinky lake’.

And Ipanema Beach just happens to be the sexiest beach in the world.

Whoever named it so was either a master of irony or spent too much time in Amsterdam’s coffeeshops.

Think lithe, tanned bodies gamboling about in creative beachwear. Think palm-fringed sands flirting with turquoise waters with a picturesque vision of jagged cliffs resembling an open-mouthed whale. Think nighttime hedonism in Rio’s Baixo Quiteria, a street bursting with bars and clubs.

Rio: Because not all stories start with, “So, there we were, chilling at the sexiest beach in the world…”

4. Take a Motorcycle Trip to Leh-Ladakh

Not one of your conventional bachelor party destinations, I grant you, but think about it. Nothing says bromance like burning rubber over long miles with your pack of friends.

Hire your bikes from Manali and hit the road. Take leisurely pit-stops at roadside dhabas and scenic spots along the way. Here’s a guide to help you figure this one out.

The route to Ladakh is arduous and unpredictable. But when you’ve finally made it, when you’ve pitched camp near the remarkable Pangong Lake and are sharing war stories with your friends under the stars, you can say, “Looks like we made it.”

And get beer bottles thrown at you for being a sentimental wuss.

Ladakh: Once, just between friends. No pun intended.

5. Take Things Up a Notch In Montreal, Canada

This is the definitive bachelor party idea. Seriously, it does not get much better than this.

Let’s start with a day’s itinerary for you, shall we? Just a little teaser…

Want to start your day with a morning speed boat tour?

Have an afternoon lunch eating delicious ‘poutine’ with the boys? (It’s a French delicacy, do not come home without having some.)

Party like a rockstar with an EDM music festival?

Catch an ice-hockey game around the evening?

Marvel at ladies standing outside in the freezing cold wearing little black dresses?

Brush up your French-speaking skills with said ladies?

Try the bevy of nightclubs, steakhouses and strip joints that line the streets?

Montreal: The answer to all the above.

Hope this helped. Now, join me in a two-minute silence for the noble one headed towards the mandap.